Fridge Light
When we first started,
you saw the emptiness in my fridge.
My capabilities lay bare,
My indecisiveness.
Can't plan ahead,
Can't organize
These very traits I have,
keep my esteem pulverized
And for me, the light in the fridge
is always on
Shining a light on just what is wrong
I fill my days with intentions,
Lists I won't complete
Promises shouted loudly,
That life won't let me keep
You reach for structure,
I crumble into air
My scattered mind’s a burden,
more than you signed up to bear
Every shelf in disarray,
thoughts piled high,
Tasks left unfinished,
your loud quiet sigh
Yet you stand there frustrated,
hoping I'll evolve
While I'm still searching for pieces,
of puzzles I cannot solve
You're longing for order,
for a steady, clear mind
But I'm tangled in these wires,
my rhythm is like 13/8 time
I want to give you comfort,
stability in storms
But my goddamned dysfunction,
twists and deforms
So the fridge stays empty,
And the cold light remains
Illuminating deficits,
and these byzantine chains
Yet within this chaos,
there's still someone true
Imperfect and scattered—
who tries to please you
I ask you gently, softly,
Can this be enough?
Loving me fully,
with all of this stuff
For the fridge is empty,
and my mind is a mess
But the heart is willing—
if you can love me as less.